73 < 10 > AT HOME, 1982 Lucy woke up the next morning with Shari’s slow sonorous breathing only a few feet away. Then for the first time she was conscious of an unaccountable and terrifying sensation. “See you at school tomorrow. . ” “It isn’t nice getting there. Why not? Imagine I’ve had a fit of hysteria—and that I’ve come round. “I wonder,” she said, “how much you care. Rather a magniloquent term, perhaps, but what else am I to say? One of these is that the most absolutely selfish thing in the world is to give way to depression, to think of one’s troubles at all except of how to overcome them. Leonardo was to me perhaps like a father, not a lover as you think.
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